* 23042007 *

sometimes i really think this is pissing me off.

my right brain tells me i am always accomodating him.
but my left brain says that's the way he is, let it go.
so in the end, i felt sick!

i am still in the office at the moment.
and the reason why is because he is too.
and i get really sick when i go home to wait for him,
i'd rather wait here in the office and earn some money at the same time.
when i wait for him at home, it will usually take longer for him to knock off.
but when i am in the office, he will SORT OF feel the pressure and try to rush things a bit here and there.

and he texted me a minute ago to tell me he's working slightly later today.
we agreed on 730pm, now he's asking for 830pm.
although his sentence phrasing sounds really alright, like,
"work until 830pm can?"
with that question mark at the back doesn't really mean it's a question.
it can actually simply put off as a statement.
so i tried reprociating with a,
" but i am hungry le.. 830pm ar? then i go home first "
hoping that he'll 可怜 me and knock off as agreed at 730pm.
however, things aren't as pretty.
"okay" was all i got from him. :(

see, i am pissed. (says right brain)

but i knew it all along that he's a workaholic la. (says left brain)

damn it! (says me as a whole)

a hungry shiyun is a angry shiyun.
wahpiangz! hungry la!

oh and yes.
we went imm to do some regular shopping and lunching.
then he bought quite a lot of things back for him mum and brother to munch on.
like 鸡扒 , oldchangkee, cheecheongfun and blah blah...
then i wanted to had sugar rolls from polar.. but i was thinking..
ok lar, might as well buy a few more for his family lorr..
so i ordered 6 instead and pack them nicely in a box.

so when we got home and laid the spread on the dining table,
they went feasting on the 鸡扒 , oldchangkee, cheecheongfun..
BUT not the sugar rolls.
THANK YOU.
(sugar rolls are desserts meant for after food) says left brain.
(crap la!) says the right one.

hais.

don't know what the hell is wrong.

but i did managed to exchange a few words with the brother's GF
whom hates me i feel.
we seen each other probably 3times already, and each time i smiled at her.
she walks off, like as if i stepped on her wicked tail.
arrggh!

let it be.
i am tired, but luckily left brain is still fighting strong :)

keep fighting!
*** sHiiy Un` QUee niE-joj 0 *** as at 7:54 PM

* 13042007 *

I am very particular about the calculator i am using.
You will understand what i am trying to say if you were to calculate sums almost everyday.
And recently, i have been bugging the stationery control person to buy me a new calculator.
Only because i think mine is lagging, and i can't seemed to get the sums tallied.

whereas when i am using my colleague's it's almost perfect EVERYTIME.

so i am saying, the tools matters alot in fact.

so, i managed to get her to buy me a new one.
but it is still not the perfect feel.
the keys are hard and not comfortable.
so, it's either too big, or too small.
too widely spaced out or too near one another.

ok, u just won't get it.

i am going popular later to get myself a calulator.
but sometimes, even popular calculators are very limited.
not many variety to choose from. :(

*************************************************

Qi is enjoying himself in Redang at this moment.
12hours bus journey + 1.5hour boat ride.
and he's willing to go through these to capture the beauty of the marine life.
it is not really attractive to me though.
so i stayed. and he went, with 4 other friends.

i met up with sherine yesterday and i was telling her about the deep conversations
that me and qi had been engaging these while.
i mean.. i was over-negative about the whole thing..
and he's uncertain too.
i believe so.

he's not the " I Love You Forever" kind of person.
he's just not like that.
and will never be la.
coz he thinks that it's fake and useless.
he thinks that the word "forever" doesn't even exists.

well, true to certain extend.

anyway, it's quite hard to blog about what the conversations were actually revolving around.
sometimes, he's telling me not to treat him so nicely,
sometimes, he's complaining that i am not 体贴。
ironic.

so all in all..
i am still trying to adapt to the fact that i am actually not single.
and the fact that i have to treat his parents like as if, they are mine.
be slightly pretendious about buying gifts for his family members during festive seasons and birthdays.

mop the floor
iron his clothes
bath his dog

@@%$&*&(**&%^$#%@@#!@#(*)

this is too much
i am thinking way too much.

another4days
*** sHiiy Un` QUee niE-joj 0 *** as at 5:10 PM

* 09042007 *


一波未平一波又起
this is only what i can say.
we only just started, so many uncertainties, so many things to learn, so many things to figure out.
but while i am not even halfway there, already we have problem arising.

his mum didn't like me.
okay, probably i should put it in another way.
His mum didnt think that we are compatible.
as in, the closest person to yourself is usually your family members.
so natually they will know what kind of person you are, and which kind of girl will attract u.
and possibly this is what happened.
she didn't think that i was the kind of girl for him.
his mum even asked if he had feelings for me or not.

"就是有感觉才在一起啊，适不适合就要在一起了才会知道"
this was what he said.

i was rather speechless.

not becoz i like the way he handled it.
it was the total opposite.
coz i sense his confusion, his uncertainty.
he didn't stand up for me one bit.
DID NOT. ;(
he was more to telling his mum, the future is yet to be known,
let's see how long we can stay together, then we decide la.
this kind of mentality.

well, but at least it's better than, "i don't know."
hais.

relationship is really tiring.
and imagine this.
we only just started.
how long is this battle going to last?
how long can i withstand all these?


未知数
*** sHiiy Un` QUee niE-joj 0 *** as at 10:22 AM

* 05042007 *

Hmm we will see each other everyday at work.
Almost everyday after work.
Dinners, Movies, Walks, Cafes, Parks, Snooker...
Exactly what i thought sweet, romantic relationships should have been like.

But will things last this way?

I am sure he wants some free time to himself one day.
And me too though.
But at this point of time when we first started, gluing to each other are inevitable.
So let me enjoy the gluing process before the glue runs dry. :)

Well, becoz i've been sleeping rather late these few days.
And hanging out too much.
Having not enough sleep is my fatal kill.
Falling sick soon, can already see the syndromes.

Therefore, he went Basketballing while i slept at a recorded 10pm.
LOL.
And when he called me at 1030pm.
I am already faraway in lalaland.
Sorry but..
*nice complexion after 8hours sleep.*
hahaha! ;)

But i do have some complains.
He never return smses on time.
By the time it comes, i completely forgetten the topic we were in.

And he is seriously a workohalic.
He works 6.5days a week, even public holidays.
That's why we can only see each other at night.
Past dinner time sometimes..
Yes, i knew it all along he's like that..
And so to this.
i kudos to him. Nothing to say.
Maybe i should try to understand his fatigue after work and yet still having to meet me.
Yes Yes..
But i lead a normal 11pm sleeping life before he came into mine, so who should change?
Me or him?

Neither nor.

Just be it.

Holiday is tomorrow.
And Yes, U are right..
He's coming back to the office.
However, i appreciate his effort to ask me out for breakfast tomorrow at 8am.
Gawwwddd! At 8.am i am still in dreamland. :(

Initially our plan is to drive to Queensway to get his Adidas/Nike.
Cannot really decide yet.. then to Ikea to buy my bed linen + spread.
That was the at first plan.
But seemed like, not in the work anymore.

This Sunday got to attend a colleague's wedding dinner in JB.
I hope it's safe.

P/S: Sherine, i didn't get him to buy me the seaweed. ;) But my mum bought it for me instead.

random complaints ;p
*** sHiiy Un` QUee niE-joj 0 *** as at 10:38 AM